Thanks for resting your eyeballs here for a moment.(They are resting, right?) If you rest them a little longer, you may learn some interesting,(hopefully)entertaining, and, yes, ocassionally BIZARRE things about French Country life. (more…)
French Country Travel Life Gremlins. They’re real. Not”flesh n’ blood” real – but sand in yer oyster” real. And they will put that sand in your particular oyster at any time. For any Reason. And there is diddly you can do about it.
I know. Because I have been “gremlinated” several times by them thar French Country Travel Life Gremlins. Always when everything was going just fine. But then, that’s what “gremlination” is all about – innit?
Of my many encounters with these supernatural meanies, three are most vividly etched in my memory:
Gremlination One :
There are a number of islands off the Atlantic Coast of france, accessible mainly from the city of Nantes. (pro:”Nawnt”) Like most islands reachable by a short ferry ride, their population explodes during “the season.” Which in France, normally starts after the kiddos escape school in early June.
I was headed to one of these bucolic isles. Happily in the last week of April. And, yes, the weather WAS co-operating. More than usual. To the point where the mercury was a good 10° above the norm. Sounds perect -dunnit? And guess what – that’s just what the Gremlins thought too.
They decided to have a little fun with me on that sweltering day. After a five hour journey to arrive at the ferry landing…just as I was mustering my seriously depleted energy ferry-ward….the “G People” belly laughed themselves by exploding my front tire! Not just the tube, mind you. But the tube AND tire. With an enormous roar. Worthy of any cinematic special effect.
Think it can’t get worse? – Chew on this:
This was another Ferry Boat caper. However the G People decided to increase my tension by NOT manifesting themselves on departure. They had other plans for me. And exiting the ferry, happily, was not one of them. No, they had something much more devasting to unleash. And, true to form, they waited until I was in a suitably remote section of the island of Corsica. (And there are many.)
Then, just as the Sun was starting to caress the blue horizon – They Struck! Almost silently. Were it not for the fact that pedaling suddenly seemed effortless, I would never have noticed that my chain – she which propels it all, had (gremlinly) snapped. And more to the point..was at the top of the serious hill I had just descended.
One of the great joys of France -and my major reason for being here – is that there are multiple routes to almost everywhere. ie – Freeway/Major road/Minor Road/not on the map road/country lane, etc…..you’re getting my drift, are you not?
It was on one of these indescribably perfect tiny routes that the French Country Travel Life Gremlins trotted out their “Coup de Grem” Their ultimate ultimatum to remind the exotic stranger from the faraway lands that: “we are in control – and you are toast!” Yes, Dear Reader, they had saved the “best” for the last.
I knew they’d struck again when my perfectly balanced machine suddenly became imperfectly balanced. The reason? The G People had snapped the left one of the two struts that support the rear wheel!
Bottom Line: Don’t go sailing out on your sea of adventure thinkin’ that the wind will always be at your back, and the sun beaming brightly down from a cloudless sky. Because those are exactly the conditions French Country Travel Life Gremlins L-O-V-E!
Bicycle Gourmet’s Lavender Photo Course Workshop 2014…is full. Complete. Stuffed to the brim. With happy snappers. Who will be joinin’ DA BG to enhale(and that is the right word) the wonders of the emergence of Lavender on the French Country Travel Life Backroads this here June.
But, do not, repeat do not shed any tears (crocodile or otherwise) if you weren’t able to join BG Team Lavender this time around. Because, there’s always next time! And there’s always them thar folks who have their perfectly made plans thwarted by such blue meanies as work, deadlines, and bosses with no sympathy.
But wait….there’s MORE good news! Limited space still be existin’ on the remaining 2014 BG Photo Courses. So now – not later – is the time to give them a look-see if you are a French Photo Junkie.
Bicycle Gourmet’s Non Chocolate Easter Eggs. They’re tasty! They’re colorful! but…they’re not chocolate. However, on the plus side, unlike the chocolate variety, DA BG’s Non ChocolateEaster Eggs are Permanent. They will live as long as you do. Maybe longer.
Another huge bennie is the fact that unlike the chocolate kind, which only bring enjoyment one time, the Non Chocolate Eggs of TheBicycle Gourmet Easter Varietywill bring you oddles of joy,contentment(and possibly inspiration) every day.
Now, don’t get the idea I’m dissin’ the chocolate variety. No Sir and Ma’m! I will be chowin’ down on them as well. (Gotta love those chocolate bunnies!) But, I always like to offer you experiences that are, well…”off the beaten track.” (As you’re probably aware) And what could be MORE off the trail of regular hum-drum predictable than Non Chocolate Easter Eggs From the Bicycle Gourmet?
Just one thing to keep in mind. They’re not edible. Ok, you could chow down on them if you’re either very hungry, a little weird, or both. But they wouldn’t be “tasty” in that sense.
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as others have noted..a very creative and informative post. you DO spoil us; and we love it! lara doone | 12May14 | More
why is chocolate reserved for easter!..chocolate all year round!!! norm flockhart | 12May14 | More
i can't think of any writers who could sustain a metaphor for as long as you did..and with continuing to … arnie nemons | 12May14 | More
we got some great lavender photos last year...by accident! we just happened to be in lavender country at the right … sam and betty feldman | 12May14 | More
it's at the top of my "to do before i die" list....no worries (lol) carla stavers | 12May14 | More
happy to carla....if you'll take care of my bills! robert malcom | 12May14 | More
robert.....well...you could tell the boss to go where the sun don't shine§ carla stavers | 12May14 | More
if i were a beer drinker..i'd cry in it...becasue i missed out on the lavender with DA BG.....but, hey..it wasn't … robert malcom | 12May14 | More
your talents are endless!..not only a great writer..but a great (as in original!) photographer. hats off to DA BG! ed mason | 7May14 | More
dave said it all.......truly amazing images....a great example of why anyone interested in photography should be on a BG workshop! unger stevens | 7May14 | More